The Cramuel’s – The journey of a “gay” couple

Hi! My name is Samuel. I am a half Spanish, half Italian gay man.

I was brought up in a Flemish coalminers town in Belgium. At the age of 18, I felt I needed to add some more spice and flavour to my life and that wasn’t going to happen if I stayed in my little birth town. One Summer, I decided to say goodbye to all my childhood friends, pack my bags and move to one of the most beautiful cities on this planet in the South of Spain … Seville. I fell in love with the culture, the climate, the gastronomy and the people I met.

However, my feet got itchy again and felt I had to keep exploring. I decided to move to the United Kingdom.

I gave up my flat and donated all my belongings to African refugees who crossed over to Spain in the hope of a better life. Manchester welcomed me with open arms but the rain and cold were just killing me. That’s where I discovered what the word “nippy” meant and that clouds had 50 shades of grey. I remember that Summer of 2005 very well as it felt as if I had skipped a Summer in my life.

After 10 long months, I decided to pack my bags again and move to a paradise to top up on my vitamin D. Tenerife was my next destination.

You’d think I had found happiness there, but in my case it was far true. Three months later I ended up in the United Kingdom again … this time in Cambridge.

The first few months were bloody hard as I felt I had failed and I couldn’t find the perfect place for me to settle down. But this time I was determined to make it work … and a decade later, I am still here.

Cambridge has become my home. My partner and I recently purchased an apartment and we feel overjoyed about it. Together with our cat we lead a busy but very eventful and satisfying life.

This is the place where life really began for me … from a religious, sad “straight guy” to an ambitious, happy gay man … but you will find more about it through this blog.

So, how did we decide to start our own blog?

Quite a few gay blogs and magazines picture a gay man’s life as something difficult and give it a tragic touch to spice things up a little bit. It is true that there are many obstacles that we need confront as a gay man, but there are a lot of beautiful and positive things to be shared as well. And that is our goal.

Through our experiences as a gay couple, we hope to be able to help out some beautiful gay souls out there that are looking for their soul mates but have just been exposed to the stereotypical gay world feeling trapped in a life that doesn’t fulfill them. We have all been there before and we know how hard it is. Not only is it hard to fit into a world where homophobia is still a high concern, but it is also hard to live in a gay world where sex and instant gratification has overpowered a healthy and balanced standard of living, both physically as psychologically.

We would like to share the joys and challenges of being in a gay relationship … and how to be positive and make things work even when life gets hard from time to time. It is also a way to track how our relationship is evolving.

We both don’t have any experience on how to run a blog … but what we do have is a wealth of experience on how to find happiness even when things get tough, how to laugh, how to love, how to forgive, how to accept each other for who we are and how to recover from a difficult and abusive past.

One thing is for sure … we love each other very much and bless the day we found each other … and we would like to share a part of that love and happiness with the world … yes … with you.

Last but not least, our friends call us The Cramuel’s when they want to refer to us as a couple. Needless to explain why that name was chosen.

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Hola! My name is Craig. I am half geek and 100% British and I am slightly disappointed about this (the British bit – I love being a geek). I am not very patriotic and grumble about English food, culture and the weather. But I am proud of my British heritage deep down. I simply wish I were exotic.

I was born in Newmarket (10 miles from Cambridge) and lived most of my childhood and early adulthood in Soham (a small town 20 miles from Cambridge). It’s safe to say, I am clearly an inbred Fen-boy. My ancestry barely leaves East Anglia.

At the age of 20 I moved to Brighton for a summer. Very cliché but this is when I realized I was gay. I used to glass collect in a club and on Thursday nights the club hosted a gay night. That first Thursday shift I saw 2 men kissing – and I have never been so aroused in all my life! I’ve been gay ever since. Deep down I always knew but I convinced myself I would follow in the footsteps of my elders and get the wife, have some kids and get the white picket fence! The day I decided this wasn’t a) for me or b) what I wanted – was liberating!

After going through a very difficult period in my life, I almost moved to The States in 2009 to study art and design in California. However, I decided after a year of saving it was simply too much money! Instead, I saved up and moved to my first house with a close friend. Soham was always going to be too small for me and after giving up onTthe States I decided to move to Cambridge in 2012.

I met my first boyfriend the same year. After a year of convinced happiness I was dumped in the worst way possible. I nursed a broken heart for a year and then picked myself up, bought a kitten and started to try and change my circle of friends and lifestyle. I gave up smoking, I stopped drinking half a bottle of wine every night and I started looking for Mr Right.

I met Samuel in April 2013 and after kissing many frogs I knew I had found my prince. Almost 2 years later and we are living in a new apartment with Rukia (our cat). We travel the world. We spend many hours with friends and family. We go for walks together. We cook together. We watch boxsets together. I have never been happier!

For me this blog is a window into our life … our ups and downs. No one really knows what to do when it comes up to love and life. I want people to see this and realize there are no rules. Just do what makes you happy!

So, how did we decide to start our own blog?

For Samuel, it is all about helping people. It’s more serious for him and he has this sort of legacy. I am more awkward in the limelight (I am the sort who always does something goofy when having a photograph taken). For me this blog is a way of networking and an interactive diary. It’s a way of spreading knowledge and trialing new things. It’s about meeting new people and getting ideas. I want every person who reads our blog to think about his or her own life and decide to do something to make it better. Like a good movie, I want people to come away and feel good about their life. I’ve come through so much negative stuff in my life to get here – but it was worth it. I am not happy about everything that has happened to me, but I am proud of the man it has made me. A wise half Spanish and half Italian man once had a post it stuck on his wall, which read… ‘be the change you want to see in others’.

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